suicide walk

I went to Out of the Darkness' suicide walk downtown today. I didn't expect it to affect me, but I ended up pulling my hoodie over my head and sitting on top of a brick wall and crying in the sun. All these people acknowledging that they know, that they care. All these people - and still I don't trust that I will never go down that road. Love isn't enough, is it?

I went with no plan in mind, but I ended up walking for Sonny, mostly, and I fingerspelled his name over and over as I walked.

I walked for Sonny, who is gone;
for KP and EV and EC who are in the middle of it;
for RR who made it;
and for me, because I'm still afraid.